Thursday, June 12, 2014

X-Men: Days of Future Past

Go see this movie
So I'm a little late on this. I was supposed to go see X-Men: Days of Future Past on opening weekend, but shit happened. So here's the review for those of you who have yet to see it and aren't sure if you want to.

Let's get started then. Because it's a ridiculously long title for the rest of the review I am just going to call it DOFP. DOFP was directed by Bryan Singer, and he did a pretty alright job. DOFP contained all of the usual player. Wolverine (Hugh Jackman), Professor X (Patrick Stewart (old), James McAvoy (young)),  Magneto (Ian McKellen (old), Michael Fassbender (young)), Mystique (Jennifer Lawrence),  and so many more fabulous actors who played fabulous parts. The cast and the acting quality is probably not what you are concerned about. I don't think anybody can say any of the actors in the X-Men franchise were poorly picked.

It's the plot that you're probably worried about. DOFP opens with an apocalyptic type landscape and the implication of war and bad luck for future mutants, and then jumps into an epic fight scene and then time travel and stuff. Not bad. The plot is basically oh no bad shit happened and now we gotta use Kitty Pryde's (Ellen Page) powers to fix the things that Mystique did that accidentally caused all these robots to be able to take us all out. I don't think the plot was as confusing as everyone thought it was going to be. I think maybe people were over thinking it. Like I took my friend who had only seen the first X-Men movie and she wasn't even confused.

I did have a little tiny problem though. Not enough older mutants. I was really really really looking forward to seeing Storm (Halle Berry) and Iceman (Shawn Ashmore) and a lot of other cool characters from the first three movies, but there was a major lack. They basically got two small (but awesome) fight scenes. One at the beginning and one at the end. So I was a little disappointing in the lack of awesome older mutants. We did see a lot of Wolverine though, which is so expected I could cry. Don't get me wrong, I love Wolverine, but why does he got to be a major role in everything.

Overall I really liked it. Since it's in it's last few weeks the theater was pretty empty and if you need something to do for two hours you might as well check this out. If you've seen the other X-Men movies then the ending to this is going to make you go AHFJHDKSDLJH. So yeah. Totally worth the forty bucks going to the movies yanks out of your pocket.

I give this movie four stars

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Project Cain by Geoffrey Girard

I would not recommend this book.
Before we get into the review let me just say that the "author/blogger drama" surrounding this book will not be factored into my review. Because you know. I'm not in eighth grade and I don't care about the he said she said of it all.

With that said, boy am I disappointed. I can't believe I wasted my, now very limited, time reading this. It was a good concept and it just ended up all wrong.

What do I mean by that? Well. The book is about clones of serial killers. How in the world do you mess up such a cool concept? I mean really. I hate to sound creepy with a capital C but, serial killers are kinda my thing. Clones are cool too. So what went wrong?

Meet sixteen year old Jeff. Clone of Jeffrey Dahmer. Name sound familiar? Well if you use your car radio then you've probably heard Katy Perry's song Dark Horse (and you've probably heard it a billion times) and he's briefly mentioned in there. But he was actually like kinda more interesting than the Katy Perry song makes him seem. He was a gay serial killer who killed like seventeen dudes and then like kept their body parts sometimes. You can look it up if you want. Which is exactly what Girard tells you to do. Instead of giving some really interesting information on Dahmer he has Jeff tell readers to look him up. Strike one. Granted I was already pretty familiar with Dahmer, because as I said before, serial killers are kinda my thing, but the average person isn't as insane as me and probably wouldn't know about Dahmer. Especially not a teenage audience. Most teens aren't going to stop what they are doing to look it up themselves. I'm kinda disappointed that we didn't get more into the details of some of the monsters they talked about.

So that was strike one. What about two? Well. The writing itself is a mess. One thing I'm sure you've heard your English teacher say over and over again is "SHOW DON'T TELL" and I don't think this guy got it. There was a lot of telling and not enough showing. At times it was almost like the information was just being thrown at me. Not good.

Strike three was the plot itself. I guess I expected it to be more of a political-science fiction-thriller type thing. And I got at lot of political government take over stuff with limited thrill and some very unlikely science fiction. A lot of conspiracy theories too. Maybe that's my fault. Maybe I shouldn't have just assumed that it was going to actionish. But I did. And now I'm disappointed.

Overall I am not impressed with this book at all.

I give this book two stars